Lessons Over A Piano
by xSeshatx
Summary: {Oneshot}. Tony Stark can play piano. Did you know? His team certainly didn't.


There's no way Tony Stark was anything other than what was on the surface. He was arrogant to say the least. Self-important might be a better word, however. He was more than a little bit sarcastic and he couldn't take a situation seriously to save his life. He was rude beyond what anybody expected for somebody who donates so much money to a countless amount of charities. To add to that he also opened up his tower to the other avengers even though he knew he didn't have to and wasn't even inclined to. Sometimes his rudeness confused people, but that's just how he was. He was just a playboy who always tried to get different women into his bed every night and not even stick around to say goodbye to them come morning.

On the inside was a different story, but Tony would never admit it. He was arrogant to a certain extent, but so was everybody who was near his level of intelligence. He knew he was smart; he knew he was more than just a genius. He had created so many things including robots and an artificial intelligence. Speaking of which, if anybody were to ask Stark what his best invention was he would say his Iron Man suit with such conviction that it would be impossible to even think about not believing him. What the truth was, though, is that he believed his best invention was Jarvis. That AI was smarter than he ever intended and he took good care of his creator. Somehow the AI also had different emotions - or at least spoke in different emotions - and was able to speak in certain tones. Jarvis was like a friend to Tony, and he had no idea what he'd do if something malfunctioned with the AI. Stark would always be proud of that one.

Despite knowing he was a genius, however, nobody doubted Tony more than Tony doubted himself. It was too easy for him to make a mistake especially with the way his mind worked. His brain worked too fast for his eyes, hands, fingers, and his mouth, and he was able to make mistakes. He often did, too, but Jarvis would almost always catch them for him. He had been diagnosed with dyslexia at an early age, as well, so sometimes he struggled reading or writing anything. It was easier with technology which was why it was rare to find a pen or pencil in his lab. Jarvis had also informed him that he showed significant symptoms of Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder which he had elected to ignore. To add to all of his own problems he also doubted himself because of his father. As a child his father always seemed to think he was stupid despite the creations he made at such a young age and the fact that he always seemed to understand what his father was talking about. He was told time and time again how stupid and idiotic he was. So he never seemed to trust himself and his own calculations one hundred percent without Jarvis checking it over. Sometimes he doubted Jarvis, too, since he's the one who created the AI.

Tony was also extremely kind-hearted. He always had everybody's best intentions in mind. This was the reason he was never completely straight up with Miss Pepper Potts. He wanted her close to him forever, but he knew just how much trouble he would be compared to normal, and he was hard to deal with on a good day. He couldn't allow himself to relax and stop his little 'I don't care' act because he knew when he did he would hurt and he hurt too much as it was. Tony was always willing to sacrifice himself if it meant he'd be the only one in pain. There had been multiple times where he had pulled somebody back before getting hit by a car or stepped in front of an innocent stranger if a suspicious looking person was walking passed them. Sometimes he would wonder if there was anybody who happened to care more than he did. He cared so much he was working (for free) on a way to have an unlimited supply of clean energy for the world instead of just his tower. He cared so much that he refused to let anybody else into his mind to see the horror's inside. He cared so much that he spent literal days awake working on something that would help somebody, and that also included not eating since he was too busy. All of this contributed to the fact that he was so much of a playboy. He needed to distract himself from Pepper so he wouldn't fall for her even more. Of course that was before he had gotten with her. He was many things but he wasn't a cheater. Despite knowing that he should have cut her off to save her the pain he simply could not lose what he had just gained. He loved her.

Of course if anybody even hinted that there was more to Stark than what he let on then he would shut them down immediately. To him there was nothing more to him than what he let people see. There was no way he was so sentimental he stared at pictures of the people of his past and cry at what he lost or what he never had. There was no way he even had a negative thought let alone have intense moments of panic when his thoughts got the best of him. Nobody should even consider the fact that he might have nightmares of the time in that damn cave, falling out of the sky in New York, facing Loki face-to-face, or any of the other goddamn missions S.H.I.E.L.D. put him and the rest of the avengers through or nightmares from his own wonderfully perfect childhood. There was nothing more to Tony Stark. He could be happy with just him and his technological advances. That was all he needed.

That's even what his teammates and the highly trained spies believed to be true with Tony Stark. Natasha Romanov, Clint Barton, Bruce Banner, Steve Rogers, and Thor had all been living with Tony in his tower. Sure, they weren't always present as they all had other things they either had to do or wanted to do. For example, Thor was often traveling back to his home planet of Asgard or to visit his love, Jane, and Black Widow and Hawkeye had constant secret missions they had to do acting as spies instead of warriors. Sometimes, though, the six of them were all living together under one roof. These times could go differently based on the day. Somedays they would all be hiding away in their own portion of the tower, though sometimes they were in pairs throughout the tower like when Bruce and Tony were working together or Clint and Natasha were training in the same room. Other days they would all lounge around the sitting room together showing Steve and Thor popular movies that they just had to watch to be 'honest members of this century' as Stark had put it. Or they would simply sitting in silence doing their own thing.

The rest of the avengers all thought that they had learned all there was to learn about the self-proclaimed "Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist." Everybody bought his complete act (but it wasn't an act if anybody were to ask Tony). That was until one specific night. The six of them were all staying in Stark Tower for the night, but it was one of the nights where they all went their separate ways. Somehow, though, they all seemed to have the same idea at around the same time because one by one the group made their way one of the many sitting rooms of the tower - the one where there was a piano, but that was just for show, wasn't it? Because there was no way Tony Stark would even think about playing something as 'not tough' as the piano. There was no way he could let his emotions flow through his fingers as he played. That just wasn't Tony Stark.

Natasha was first. Her intention wasn't to go to the sitting room (that was actually none of their intentions). She was just on her way to the kitchen to get herself a glass of water before bed when she heard the music flowing through the halls. She recognized the piano and knew it wasn't a recording but she had no idea who it was that could be playing it. Silently in the way only a spy could move she made it to the sitting room and peered inside in order to see who it was. Out of the five people in the tower she would never have guessed that the person playing the beautiful music was Tony Stark. Not many things could surprise her - the last thing to catch her off guard was when she had learned that Clint had been compromised. She wasn't even surprised when she was told Agent Coulson had died, though she was heartbreakingly sad about that. Natasha wanted to turn away and leave Tony to his private playing - because he must have been under the impression nobody would be around to hear him - but she just couldn't. She hadn't heard anybody play any instrument with such passion in a long time so she told herself she'd listen for just a few more minutes before heading to the kitchen to get that glass of water. Ten minutes later and she had positioned herself on the floor around the corner so she could listen without being spotted if he were to turn around.

The next person to hear the music was Bruce. Banner had actually been looking for Tony in order to ask him a question about the latest thing they were working on together. When he heard the playing he slowed his pace and wondered if spying on the secret player was a good idea or if he should simply head back to the lab or just go to bed instead. His curiosity won in the end and as he walked towards the sound he saw a figure sitting on the floor and leaning against the wall. He recognized the spy immediately. "Who is that?" he asked in a whisper, kneeling down beside her in order to hear her answer without her risking talking too loud and disturbing the player. When she answered that it had been Tony Stark - THE Tony Stark - he couldn't believe it. The song Tony was playing sounded so sad, and...did he recognize it? He just opened his mouth to ask her if this was the song he thought it was when she cut him off, confirming his thoughts by informing him it was Everybody Hurts by REM.

"He was playing Ave Verum Corpus by Mozart when I came down here," she informed him. Bruce silently took a seat beside her and listened to him play and slowly he, along with Natasha, began to wonder about their favorite genius billionaire.

Thor came next as he was simply exploring the tower. Sleep wasn't coming easily to him that night since he wasn't tired in the slightest so he decided to try to get a feel for his home while visiting Earth. Bruce and Natasha had heard him coming so the spy quickly made her way to him before he came too close. They all knew Thor had a slight problem with being quiet when he wasn't instructed to do so and neither of them wanted him to give them away. They were quite enjoying his playing. "Greetings, friend Natasha. May I inquire as to why you are awake so late?" he asked, giving her a warm smile.

Natasha put her finger to her lips and nodded her head in the direction of the sitting room. "Stark is playing the piano. He doesn't know we're listening, so we have to be very quiet, alright?" she said, and when he elected to nod instead of verbally answer her she led him over to where her and Bruce had been sitting together for twenty minutes - making her there for about thirty altogether. Thor knew it was best for him to remain quiet so he didn't disturb his friend Anthony. Besides, listening to his friend play so beautifully he was slowly beginning to grow more and more tired.

Clint showed up next just as quietly as Natasha only five minutes after Thor. He had woken up from a rather rough dream so he was heading to the closest kitchen to where he fell asleep to get a drink and maybe a small snack. He was drawn to the sound and was grateful he put his hearing aid back in - he almost convinced himself it wasn't worth it because he was not in any danger inside Stark tower (he hated that he trusted somebody other than Natasha, especially Stark and his AI) - because without the hearing aid he wouldn't be able to hear the music that had somehow calmed his rapid heart beat. He had dreamed about his family and the potential danger they would be in if the knowledge of them got out to anybody outside of the few people who knew about them in S.H.I.E.L.D. Natasha, of course, knew about their existence, and she was the one who actually convinced him that for the time being he had to stay away from them so they'd be safe. That didn't stop him from fearing that they weren't. The music was relaxing him before he even sat down with the others to listen. Before Banner told him it was Stark he had assumed it was Steve because Steve seemed more like the type of person to play the piano with such emotion.

Finally Steve joined the figurative party because of intuition alone. He was sketching in one of his many art pads when he felt like he had something else to be doing. Unsure of what that could be he started wandering around the tower. This was the third floor he searched, and when he heard the music he almost stopped to return to his room. This was somebody's private moment. Even worse it was one of his own teammate's private moment even if he didn't know whose. He had just turned around to walk away when a familiar song begin to play. Smoke In Your Eyes by Jerome Kern was one of the most famous songs he knew from his time and it filled him with a nostalgic feeling of listening to it with his mother. No longer able to stop himself, he followed the sound of the music. When he saw four other members of his group he knew that the missing member was the one who was playing. Doing a quick headcount he was shocked to see that the missing member was none other than Tony Stark. When he opened his mouth to comment on it, Clint spoke up.

"You're late," he said simply. "We've been waiting for you for fifteen minutes now."

"What's going on?" he questioned, sitting down beside Thor on the end of the little group of them. "It's nearly three in the morning. Why's everybody awake? I didn't know Stark could play."

"Neither did we," Bruce said with a shrug. "Natasha has been down here the longest. We've all met up unintentionally, and nobody wanted to leave."

"It's been almost an hour since I first heard it," Natasha said, speaking quieter in a silent warning for them to lower their voices. "He's been playing a little bit of everything from classical to modern."

After sitting together for another fifteen or so minutes they heard him slam down on the keys of the piano so loudly and suddenly that even Clint and Natasha jumped. "Dammit," Tony grumbled, and if they weren't mistaken it sounded like he was crying. "Jarvis, he isn't even here and he still makes me feel like a failure."

"Sir, might I suggest you speaking to somebody other than me about this? It might be good for you," the AI responded.

"No, cause then I feel like I'm just proving his point," Tony said. He sounded extremely dejected. None of the avengers had ever heard him sound like that before, not even Natasha had when she was acting as a spy for S.H.I.E.L.D. She doubted that Pepper had, either. Bruce was probably the closest person he came close to opening up to since they related so much but the most he talked about was mentioning a nightmare a few times. It was never anything serious. They all had nightmares so it was normal. None of them had any clue who made Tony feel like a failure and it was now bothering them. While they all had their disagreements with Tony from time to time (or more often than that) none of them considered him a failure. Steve had said some regretful things before they had gotten to know each other a little better, but he had long since apologized for that moment, and he didn't even hint at the fact that he was a failure.

"If it makes a difference, sir, I do not agree with the assessments your father has made of you," Jarvis said, and his voice seemed even softer than usual. When the avengers heard that it was Howard, Tony's dad, who made him feel like a failure, they all looked at each other in confusion before they turned to look at Steve. He had known Howard personally and only spoke of him as if he was a great man.

"Maybe Howard changed since I last saw him," Steve suggested quietly, avoiding their eyes. He didn't want them to feel like he knew anything about Howard that he wasn't telling them. He respected Howard and believed him to be one of the best men he has had the pleasure of meeting.

"You have to say that," Tony sighed. "I made you. How much alcohol do I have in stock? Enough to black out for the night?"

"Of course, sir. Stocks were refilled just last week. However, I must advise that you keep the drinking to a minimum, if for no other reason than to be prepared should the avengers be called to assemble."

"I guess you're right, but you know they wouldn't need me," Tony said, pressing stray keys on the piano. "They're all so...perfect, you know? I'm just a man in a suit. The suit is what they need. Anybody could work it, and if they couldn't I could always make a suit they could."

They all felt like they were intruding on an even more private moment than just listening to him play the piano but none of them even considered leaving. Hearing Stark sound so down was something they hadn't experienced or ever imagined. At some point while staying in Stark tower they all had their own little moments of weakness. A week prior to this Natasha had sat awake with Steve after he had a particularly bad nightmare, and a few days before that Thor was helping Banner when he was overcome with a moment of panic over the other guy. They've all had to help each other with something - some things small and others a lot larger. Tony was included in this but he was never on the receiving end. Sometimes it seemed like he made a point to find if one of them had an ongoing problem. Even Natasha and Clint had been comforted over something. Nobody noticed how closed off the famous Tony Stark really was.

"Sir, you've been awake for approximately sixty-two hours, thirty-seven minutes, seventeen seconds, and counting," the AI informed Tony, and in essence told all of them. "Are you in need of reminding that at seventy-two hours the brain becomes most likely to begin experiencing hallucinations? This occurred only twenty-three days ago, and the flashbacks you suffered through almost made you put your tower on a manual lockdown. I believe it is best if you retire to bed for the night to avoid further brain deterioration. Doubting yourself while unable to regulate your body's chemicals will only result in you falling further into a depression."

Tony snorted but it sounded only half-hearted. "Depression, Jarvis? That's a serious word for me rambling while tired," he said, completely avoiding the fact that his AI suggested for him to go to sleep. The rest of his group considered what he was doing and realized that the same trick had been done to them on many occasions.

"We need to have a serious talk with friend Anthony," Thor said quietly, much to their relief. If he spoke normally then they were sure to have been found out. They only nodded their agreements since Jarvis starting speaking again.

"Sir, it is 3:17 a.m. and you are in desperate need for a rest."

It was silent for a few minutes following Jarvis' last statement. Clint was just beginning to consider peeking into the sitting room to see what the genius was doing when they heard Stark sigh once again. "J, I just don't want to have anymore nightmares," he said, and they all heard his small struggle for air.

"Sir, your heart rate is increasing and your oxygen intake has decreased by three percent," Jarvis said professionally.

"Yeah, I've noticed," Tony said, his voice obviously agitated. Almost immediately after he sighed. "I'm sorry, Jar. I don't usually mean to snap like that."

"No apologies necessary, sir. I have learned your habits when you are experiencing anxiety like this," Jarvis responded. "Shall I contact Miss Potts?"

"You know I don't want her knowing about this. I'll be fine. Always am."

It took all of Steve's self control to not go in the room and help his friend out. He hated not being able to do anything. Natasha was considering tipping Pepper off so she could deal with her boyfriend. It wasn't that she didn't want to help him, of course, but she just knew if anybody could it would be Pepper. At least that's what she thought. Bruce was trying to put himself in doctor mode so hearing Tony like that wouldn't affect him as much personally. Doctor mode was always easier for him to function in. Thor was clenching his fists and it was obvious he was tempted to call for his hammer even though it wouldn't do any good. He was not yet used to human emotions but he knew this was an unwanted one and he wanted to chase it away from his friend. Clint was trying to block the sound out while trying to find a way to help Tony without making their presence known. He couldn't think of anything, though, and that was only making him more frustrated.

"If you will continue to ignore my initial advice of going to sleep, then perhaps you'll listen to my next piece of advice: if you wish to calm down I suggest that you return to playing the piano. Based off of my reports your heart rate slows down significantly when you begin to play. I believe it is a calming method that you use. Am I correct, sir?"

"As always, J," Tony said, and a moment later the sound of the piano playing continued as if it never stopped, but his playing sounded more heartbroken than before.

They all took that as the moment they should leave. Silently they all stood up and made their way towards the elevator in order to go to their respective floors. "How are we supposed to address this tomorrow?" Steve asked, trying to process what they all just heard. It was all very vague and it could have been possible that he was simply having a rare bad night, but the way Tony and Jarvis were talking suggested that it was more than one bad night.

"Maybe we shouldn't," Bruce suggested. "He obviously doesn't want us knowing. I don't know about you guys, but I'd rather him not know that we were eavesdropping. That's betraying a lot of trust there."

"I agree," Thor said, nodding. "Friend Anthony might not be very appreciative of our spying, no matter how noble our motives were."

"Mister Stark is not always a very understanding person, so I agree with Doctor Banner and Mister Thor," they all heard Jarvis say from the speaker in the elevator, making them all look up in shock.

"How did you know we were listening?" Steve questioned, still not grasping the idea of the AI. Technology confused him greatly.

"I am everywhere in Stark technology. I see and I hear all there is to see and hear. Mister Stark is unaware of you lurking around the corner, but I would refrain from making a habit of this. Mister Stark is usually a lot more attentive of his surroundings, but tonight was particularly bad for him," the AI explained.

"Why is that?" Clint asked, still looking for the source of the voice.

"I am unsure of the cause," Jarvis admitted almost sadly. "Perhaps the sleep deprivation is affecting him differently this time compared to others. That is all I will say about Mister Stark. I bid you all a goodnight."

"Alright. Thank you, Jarvis," Natasha said, exiting as the elevator door opened on her floor. She nodded her goodbye to the rest of the avengers and retired to her bedroom. Everybody else did the same thing until the only person left awake was Tony Stark himself, but after another thirty minutes or so he felt calm enough to venture into the world of sleep after heading down to his lab. He hadn't meant to fall asleep as quickly as he did. He was simply just working on enhancing a suit for Natasha to prevent some damage from reaching her body when he laid his head down for a rare moment to close his eyes. That's how he fell asleep.

When they saw Stark the next day it was like the night prior never happened. He had slept for about two hours before waking up to resume one of his many current projects. When Bruce joined him in the lab around lunchtime he had convinced the genius to go to the kitchen for some lunch as opposed to living solely off of coffee. This was one of the only ways he could help his friend and while he hated it he did what he could to hopefully make life slightly more easier for Tony Stark. He'd have to keep an eye on how often he ate and slept. The others also had their own methods for trying to help out their friend and teammate.

Steve made it a point to go down and visit Tony in his lab more often using the excuse that if he had to learn the technology of this new generation who better to teach him than Tony. While he was with Tony he would try to mention as casually as possible how much the team needed and appreciated the genius. On some days Steve was actually able to get Tony to take a break from working and take a walk around New York to see the different sites and talk about the history, both from before Steve's time and after. After a short while of them talking and Tony teaching Steve new things, the genius started asking about his father.

Clint went out of his way to get to know Tony and what he liked, and sometimes when he noticed that things weren't going too well for his friend he would surprise him with a movie night of one of his favorite movies or a dinner consisting of his favorite food. Other days he would stick his foot out in front of Tony to trip him or prank him or simply tell jokes just to remind him that he was there with them and they hadn't left. They weren't going anywhere, and Clint wanted Tony to feel like he was apart of the Avengers. He wasn't going to let Tony avoid having fun with the team because he doubted himself.

Thor would often talk about Asgard when it seemed like Tony's mind was getting away from him. He would talk about different warriors whose minds worked similar to Tony's, without saying that straightforward, and how those people were the reason battles were won in his own attempt to distract the man from his thoughts and get that there were men like Tony who were a necessity, and that he himself was needed, too.

Natasha took a slightly different approach to dealing with Tony. She took it upon herself to sit down with Stark some nights and just talk to him. She would sometimes talk about her past while following it up with questions about his own, and she would open up in order to get him to open up as well. At first, most nights Tony only remained sitting with Natasha to listen to what she had to say, but after some time he eventually started talking. He would tell her that his own childhood hadn't been too hot and that he was reminded over the "red on his ledger" anytime he saw articles or headlines about the fighting in the middle east or about himself.

It didn't take long for Tony Stark to realize that the Avengers overhead something that they shouldn't have, but he couldn't find it in himself to feel angry. He felt...touched. They didn't confront him about it, but instead they did what they could to help him without them saying that was their intentions. They were taking it upon themselves to remind him that they weren't there to just ignore him or any baggage that came with him.

It took him about half a year to fully come around but it happened. He woke up one night from a harsh nightmare about Howard (the bastard nearly broke his arm when he was seven because he wanted to build a robot instead of learn what X equals) and he barely put any thought into getting up to go find his piano and play the fear away instead of working with any technology just yet. On his way to the piano he saw his team sitting around the table eating breakfast (he had been working all night in the lab and didn't realize how late it was when he went to bed).

Instead of turning around and walking away or masking his face of all emotion he took his seat at the table. Nobody asked him what was wrong but nobody needed to. They knew there was a problem and he wasn't ready to talk about it yet. He was there for the silent support they offered that he has offered all of them at some point in the past. Natasha rested her hand on top of his and squeezed but aside from that the only thing anybody did was give Tony a nod which he returned.

 _We're here for you_ their nod said.

 _Thank you._


End file.
